11/23/2023 0 Comments I dont want to go to sleepIf your child is extremely frightened and you believe they cannot tolerate being in their room alone, it is OK to occasionally stay by their bed until they fall asleep.It is better to join children in their room to provide comfort than to let them leave their bedroom. If children are allowed to get up from bed and come into your room or into the room with other family members that are awake, they may learn that their room is not a safe place. If able to stay in bed and experience that everything is OK, he / she will learn to trust the bed is a safe place. The goal is to help your child overcome fears. Don't encourage your child to get out of the bed.We will make sure that nothing bothers you so that you can sleep comfortably in your own bed all night." We are here to make sure that you are safe. Reassurance can be provided by making statements that communicate the safety of your child. If your child has a difficult time separating from you after being tucked in for the night, or if she / he calls out in fear soon after bedtime, go back and ask what is wrong.Depending on the age of your child and how well he / she is able to talk about fears, you may want to give your child the option of telling you about the fearful experiences and what might help him / her to feel less frightened at night. If he / she feels confident during the day, this will help with security at night as well. It is important for your child to have daytime experiences that serve to build self-confidence.Do not allow your child to be exposed to scary television shows, videos or storybooks that may increase fears at bedtime.Be sure that children are not interfering with each other's sleep. Sometimes sharing a bedroom with an older sibling can help reduce bedtime fears. A pet for companionship (preferably an animal that does not sleep in the bed a fish tank is a great option) can also provide security at night and reduce nighttime fear.Leaving your child's door open at bedtime can also create a sense of comfort and alleviate fear that is associated with separation from parents at bedtime. As long as the light does not interfere with your child's sleep onset, it is appropriate to have dim light at bedtime. A night-light may be helpful for providing security at night even if your child is not afraid of the dark.It may be helpful for your child to have a security object (e.g., special blanket, toy, stuffed animal) to keep during the night to help him / her to feel more relaxed at bedtime.Be careful not to establish rituals to "clear the room of monsters." These attempts to comfort your child may inadvertently create a situation in which you are delaying bedtime and providing entertainment for your child as opposed to providing comfort. It may be helpful for your child to explore fears in the safety of the day. These actions tend to make children think you believe in the imagined object as well. For example, if he / she is afraid of monsters, don't get out the monster repellant spray or broom to sweep the monster away. Once you understand the nature of your child's fear, it is important not to support or build up these fears.A fear that may seem silly to an adult may seem very real to a child. Never dismiss or make fun of a child's fear. It is not uncommon for younger children to have difficulty telling the difference between what is real and what is imaginary. The nature of children's fear is different throughout development. However, don't force your child to talk about the fear if he / she is not ready. Give your child a chance to tell you what makes him / her scared at bedtime. It is important to understand your child's fears.If a fear of the dark or going to bed is preventing your child from falling asleep or sleeping through the night, you may consider some of the following recommendations to help reduce your child's fear during the night and help him / her to get better sleep. Most children experience nighttime fears at some point during childhood. It is normal for young children to have fears of the dark and going to bed at night.
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